Why Do People Get Back Together With Their Ex?
Have you ever seen a couple you know date for years and then all the sudden break up? People break up all the time for many different reasons. It is just a part of life. However, what confuses me is when the couple gets back together. What was the point of the break up in the first place? What I realized was that there are so many reasons why people get back together.
They fixed the problem
Couples break up for a lot of reasons. Most of the time it’s for problems that in the moment feel like they cannot be fixed. Sometimes space away from each other to figure out that the relationship is worth more than the problems is necessary. That’s okay. However, couples need to realize that the problems are still going to be there. Tackle them with a new perspective.
Misunderstandings
Have you ever seen those scenes in movies where couples break up when the girl walks in and catches their significant other kissing another person and she runs out all upset? Then later figuring out that it was all a misunderstanding and that the SO pulled away after the girl ran out. Yeah, as cliche and annoying as those scenes are, misunderstandings break people up faster than water freezing in your freezer.
Nobody is perfect and trust me, I get upset over misunderstandings all the time. It’s nothing new. However, it’s all about slowing down and thinking about what’s going on before you react. Ask more questions before jumping to conclusions. If you end a relationship over a misunderstanding and then get back together once you realize it was a misunderstanding, that can do a lot more damage to the relationship than the actual break up part.
Realized feelings were still there
This happens a lot with some people. They break up for a valid reason, but get back together because they still had strong feelings for each other. The break up is killing them. Trust me, I’ve been there with the feelings part. I’d ask my ex (that I’m still friends with) if we should get back together. The answer is always no because we broke up for a very good reason.
Sometimes it brings couples closer together when they get back together. However, I highly suggest coping with the break up and the left over feelings than getting back together with your ex. You broke up for a reason. That reason isn’t going anywhere or going to magically change once getting back together.
Time has went by
Time is known for healing all sorts of wounds. Most of the time, it helps give you the space needed to breathe and feel all the emotions you need to feel and then come back to the situation with a level head. Same thing for relationships and break ups.
For example, it took me a year and a half to finally realize that my break up with my ex of two years was a necessary thing. It’s heart breaking to realize, but it’s good to know now that I can look back objectively and without the pain that the break up caused me.
For some people, after time as gone by, they realize that their break up wasn’t what they wanted and get back together with their ex. It’s an okay thing. As long as you know what you are doing and you are happy.
You both are in a better place
This is very important. Some people break up because they aren’t in a good place at the time they were in a relationship. That’s perfectly okay. Sometimes you need to take the time during the break up to reevaluate your life choices and take the time to do you. If it’s meant to be you’ll find each other again and get back together and be stronger for it. But that break up time is very important for people who are struggling with themselves and need the help they deserve.
Realized the break up wasn’t the solution
Some couples break up over stupid reasons. It makes me sad to think that people would do that. However, I know that after two weeks the couple end up getting back together because they realized breaking up wasn’t the solution to their problem. Honestly, I believe that if someone needs that time to realize that there was another solution to their problem to get back together and be happy, then go for it. However, it is slightly toxic to break up and get back together over and over again. I would really think about other solutions before immediately jumping to breaking up.
