I’ve heard the phrase “You’re so lucky to have a twin!” countless of times growing up from friends, family, and people I didn’t really know at all. And I’m going to be honest- I am lucky to have a twin, but the truth is that having a twin isn’t always sunshine and daisies. You’re twin is like any other sibling that you will have countless, pointless fights with and annoy the bejesus out of each other mainly because you’re bored. But at the same time, he or she isn’t just any other sibling.
My twin brother and I were my parents’ first-born children so being born with a twin saved me from being lonely for the first two, three years of my life before my sister was born. We got to play together as we discovered the world around us while driving our parents mad. My mother loves to tell the story of when she tried locking the two of us in our room together to try to get us to take our naps while she got 30 minutes to herself. The silence in the house convinced her that we had given in to nap time; however, that wasn’t the case. When she came to check up on us she had discovered that we had taken all of our clothes out of the dressers, thrown our dirty diapers on the walls, and were running around the room naked. Let’s just say, she never tried that again. My twin brother and I were a team who did everything together, but that was only when we were little.
As young children, my twin and I didn’t really have a say in what we did so we ended up doing everything together. For instance, my preschool teachers advised that I be held back another year, but my brother could go on. My mother held us both back not wanting to split the two of us up. And it eventually becomes a habit for the parents- I was getting a guinea pig so he was getting a guinea pig; he was getting a cell phone so it was only fair that I got one as well. Nevertheless, the habit does fade. My twin brother and I haven’t gone to the same school since 7thgrade. Since then, I got more involved into musical theatre, springboard diving, and volleyball. He took an interest in the drums and tennis. However, that doesn’t weaken the bond between the two.
My family was eating dinner one night when my twin brother punched me on the arm. He held the same arm and said “Ouch!” with me at the same time. For the rest of the dinner he tried to convince me that we had a telepathic sense due to us being twins. Let me assure everyone that this is not the case; however, twins are able to better sense what the other twin is feeling.
My twin has always been able to tell when I’m feeling upset or angry, which is probably one of my favorite parts about having a twin because he always knows how to cheer me up. He’ll start cracking some jokes or teasing me until I stopped resisting the smile taking over my face. Sometimes all it took was him saying the word “pudding,” which for some reason never failed to make me smile and laugh for a solid five minutes. Twins cheer each other up because seeing the other struggle is not only a struggle for the twin struggling, but for the twin witnessing the struggle as well. It was painful to watch my brother date girls that would hurt him over and over again. It took a lot of strength not to take his shoulders and shake some sense into him because I knew he wouldn’t like it if I got involved. Nevertheless, I took every opportunity to listen and give advice when I thought was necessary as well as flash some bright smiles before I give him our famous twin squish hug.
My twin brother made the effort to try and attend all of my performances because he believes I am a talented individual. He pushed me at times, which sometimes caused arguments between the two of us, but he truly believed that I could be better and stronger. Sometimes, that’s all a twin needs- the support and confidence from their other half.
Sharing is a natural habit that twins develop easily because they share everything. My twin brother and I shared friends, toys, books, bedrooms, a crib, etc. Rarely did we get our own birthday parties, even when we wanted to have our first sleepover party in elementary school. It worked since the boys slept in the basement and the girls slept upstairs in the living room, but it seemed a bit ridiculous to some of the parents. Since twins share everything, it makes sense that a sense of competition can possibly develop between the two.
This isn’t the case for all twins, but it is fairly common for they’re to be a sense of competition between twins when it comes to school and friends. It’s a bit strange since a twin also wants to see the other twin succeed, but it usually occurs unspoken. The twins won’t verbally bet or create stakes, but they will take note in who gets the better grades out of the two or who performed better in the piano recital. I personally was competitive when it came to friends. I noticed that everyone liked my twin brother better making it difficult for me to make friends on my own account. I constantly questioned if the girls came over for play dates to hang out with me or because they secretly wanted to hang out with my twin since they always suggested we play all together. I didn’t mind playing all together, but it did get uncomfortable when the friend would only pay attention to my twin. This made me resent having a twin for a short time frame, which I have found to be a common issue between boy-girl twins. However, I realized later on that it isn’t going to matter in the long run because your twin is really the only friend you can truly rely on.
I did a pretty stupid thing in fifth grade, and my twin was the only one who said that it was stupid and not worth it before I did it. I should’ve listened to him, and I honestly regret it every time I think of that decision of mine. My twin also has no problem telling me when I’m acting ridiculous or not thinking straight. He’s not saying it to hurt me, he’s saying it because he knows I need to hear it from someone I trust and from someone that cares about me. I’m not going to lie- it does hurt when he speaks the truth because it makes me feel as if he isn’t on my side anymore and doesn’t know me as well as I thought. But if anything, it proves it more than anything.
I sometimes wonder what life would have been like if I didn’t have a twin brother. Honestly, I sometimes forget that I have a twin brother since I hardly see him or talk to him anymore since we are both so busy with our lives. Nevertheless, I couldn’t imagine my life any other way. He truly knows me better than anyone else. He is my #1 supporter who is able to cheer me up, who never fails to put a smile on my face or make me laugh for a solid five minutes, but also isn’t scared to be coldly honest with me when I need it. He is my best friend, not because we were womb mates for 9 months, but because when you grow up with someone who is constantly by your side you realize they will always be by your side.
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