10 Things All Former Goths Can Relate To
Lots of us went through a goth stage in high school. I certainly did. Black hair, black nails, and enough eyeliner to sink a ship. Here are 10 things all former goths will relate to!
1. Wanting To Be Amy Lee
She is the Queen of the Goths and we all wanted to be her. With her flawless face, gorgeous dresses, and impeccable singing voice – she was everything you dreamed of becoming. Goth goals. Of course, you were about 14 years old and buying spikey bracelets from Claire’s. Not quite the same.
2. Feeling The G-Note Of The Black Parade In Your Soul
It still lives in you until this day. That one note that united goths, emos and scene kids everywhere. If you didn’t own a bad knock-off Black Parade jacket, and weren’t slightly offended when MCR changed their sound for Na Na Na, were you really a goth?
3. Feeling Guilty Whenever You Wear Colours
Black is the colour of goth, and your wardrobe was probably almost all black. Every now and then, though, you’d spot a cute top or dress or pair of shoes whilst you were out shopping and you just had to buy them – even though they were bright pink. You lived in fear of the day someone spotted you wearing a colour that wasn’t black and you brought shame on goths everywhere.
4. Having Permanent Scars On Your Neck From Your Choker
Choker chains do exactly what the name suggests: choke you. You definitely owned a few of these necklaces which slowly burrowed into the flesh of your neck and became part of your anatomy. If you’re anything like me, you still have the red marks to prove it.
5. Arguing About How You’re Not Emo
This is the ultimate way to anger a goth. Calling them an emo will spark a rage like you have never seen. You would scream at kids at school who dared to get your subculture wrong. Looking back now, though, you realise you were pretty similar after all. Not that you’ll ever admit it.
6. Trying To Hide Your Love For Pop Music
You were not born a goth, and at some point in your life you probably loved S Club 7 or The Jonas Brothers or Cascada. Admitting that as a goth was asking for trouble, though. You’d sit with your headphones in, bopping away to every time We Touch, then frantically change it to Avenged Sevenfold when you saw your friends approaching.
7. Writing Song Lyrics On Everything
Why did we do this? Math books, school folders, pencil cases, even Converse shoes were covered in blotchy ink stains from us scribbling Bullet For My Valentine lyrics on them. All it ever did was get us into trouble.
8. Being Mad That Twilight Stole Your Culture
One movie about teenage vampires and suddenly everyone is dressing in black, wearing chokers, and buying bat-covered everything. South Park did a whole episode on this very phenomenon, and they got it spot on.
9. Staining Your Bathroom With Black Hair Dye
Dyeing your hair jet black was a right of passage when you were a goth, but it was not an easy habit to keep up. Your mum would lose it with you for caking your white porcelain sink in thick black hair dye. Years later, you would discover that getting black dye out of your hair is a nightmare.
10. Deep Down, Missing Being Goth
Those embarrassing over-saturated MySpace photos with cheesy song lyrics edited over them on Piknik may now be the worst thing you’ve ever made – but deep down, you miss it. You miss the style, the freedom of expression, the camaraderie. Don’t forget, though, you can always get those choker chains back out and re-embrace your goth heritage. You’ll always be a goth at heart.
