The Ultimate Guide To College Parties

Your time at University is made so much better by the opportunity to party. To all those looking for the low down, here is a college parties explainer!

Your time at University is made so much better by the opportunity to party. You might be broke, assignments have stacked up and you’re constantly on the brink of an existential early 20s crisis. But when you’re at a real campus cook up of any variety it doesn’t matter. Everything melts away as the alcohol seeps into your bloodstream, the music is vibrating throughout your body and you #livelaughlove with the friends who make it all feel ok.

To all those looking for the low down, here is a quick explainer to prepare you for the debauchery that makes a degree bearable.

Uni Party Genre Guide

You’ll go to a variety of parties throughout your studies. Take it from an expert. I spent five years killing brain cells at the full spectrum of Australian University parties. I hosted messy packed ragers in a student terrace, helped organise some truly memorable nights through campus societies and took full advantage of student specials at nearly every bar in Sydney. Here are just some of the classic gatherings.

First Year Essential Experiences

The Student Union O-Week Shindig: The first major event of the Uni calendar is the O-Week party. Think hundreds of first years packed into an overheated student union bar, with hundreds more lined up around the block eager to join you. These are the easiest places on the planet to make friends you’ll see on campus for the next few years, so try to keep it cool. No one wants to bump into someone at a tute that you hooked up with mid blackout. Not cute!

The College Cook Up: These used to be the hottest tickets in town before a culture of misogyny and early-onset alcoholism hit the headlines. Think lots of very rich private school kids collectively drinking themselves to oblivion, an aversion to the muggles who populate the rest of the campus and our future leaders making decisions that might haunt them when they run for parliament. Would recommend having a taste, just for the sociological crash course.

The House Party

This is what it’s all about. A good University share house rager is impossible to match. It’s something every student lucky enough to successfully grapple with the Australian rental market will host and always the hottest invite around.

All you need is a dancefloor complete with a banging Spotify playlist, a garden for cigarette fueled catch ups and a general acceptance the place will get disgusting.

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The Substance Situation

House parties are fueled by cheap wine, by the bottle or beloved goon sack. You can also expect joints to be passed around pretty regularly, as the unmistakable cannabis clouds cloaking the surrounds will attest to. Once people hit the middle of their degrees, MDMA becomes very popular. So get ready to tell everyone how much you love them when the peak hits, before ordering the troops to the dancefloor ASAP when Rihanna starts pumping from the speakers. Nangs consumed in a darkly lit room or in a circle on the ripped up grass outside has quickly become expected.

Classic House Party Happenings

Every house party has a few scenes that can be expected to occur. The drama tends to fuel the campus gossip mill for the next few weeks after all. I’m talking about a public hook up that gets tounges wagging, some heated political debate about the big issues of the day and the public perish when someone goes a little overboard on the wines.

Of course, something that cannot be avoided is the natural end of festivities. Empties litter the floors, revellers jump into Ubers and until next time hugs are exchanged. As Vanderpump Rules theme song goes, these are the best days of our lives.