It’s no surprise that having the same personality as your significant other can make understanding them so much easier, not to mention you’ll just how to make them happy and how to avoid pissing them off! But, sometimes (almost every time) there can be disadvantages to being two peas in a pod. Here are 10 reasons why you probably shouldn’t be with someone that has the same personality:
Don’t get me wrong, there’s a lot of comfort that comes from enjoying the same things… My partner loves seafood, I’d rather watch paint dry than eat calamari. It can be a problem. But I had to try it to know I didn’t like it, and that was a new experience. Too much similarity often means that both of you aren’t going to push each other to try something new. Overtime doing the same thing can be tedious.
Dating someone with the same personality means your partner might know just how to make you happy, but they know just how to push your buttons to. Arguments will be your greatest downfall because you both have an insight on just what makes the other person tick.
Typically, in a healthy relationship competition can be what spurs you both to encouraging one another, pushing one another on to achieve the goals you set individually and as partners. But it can go bad real quick if you become competitors amongst yourselves. Soon enough you start comparing yourself to your partner. So when one partner gets a raise or continuously beats you in-game night, it can turn into jealousy and/or resentment.
The biggest worry here is that you both get into a rut that neither of you is willing to put a stop to. Just like with trying new experiences, you can both lose interest in intimacy or never leaving the house and becoming ‘homebodies’. Having the same personality means you’re both fine with it and you wind up ‘going through the motions’ with neither of you making an effort to change it.
While it’s beautiful to share similar positive attributes with your spouse, you also have the same flaws. The result of this is that you can double-down on the same mistakes and poor decisions because there’s no one to say that they think a particular course of action is a bad idea.
One of the most significant disadvantages to being with someone with the same personality type is also the biggest benefit: you see the world, and the problems you encounter, in the same way. As you’re both approaching the issue from a similar perspective, there’s nothing new coming to the table when your first plan fails. This can lead to circular attempts to try and resolve an issue; you’re desperate for a new idea, but nothing is forthcoming.
Going through the same struggles, while it may strengthen your bond, doesn’t mean you’ll be able to deal with it any better. It could actually exacerbate the situation. As above you are more likely to attach the issue in the same way, offering no new solutions for each other.
While not feeling pressured to go out can be a great pro when two introverts date, it also can cause them to alienate themselves. Since neither person feels entirely motivated to socialise, they often convince themselves to stay inside. While this might sound like a dream come true, it can actually bring a lot more disadvantages.
Extroverts are continually looking for interactions and excitement, which will inevitably lead to boredom at some point. If and when both extroverts become bored, there’s always the possibility they’ll want to end things and chase that next high.
If you are a procrastinator, lazy and easily enabled into demotivation – then it makes no sense to double down on this behaviour. There’s almost no hope for escape from your own faults if it’s enabled by your S.O to a point where you both don’t even recognise it as a fault and spiral into the depths of an unfulfilled relationship.
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