So you’ve been with your boyfriend for some time, and you’re thinking about moving in together, which is super exciting! But have you really thought it through? People often have a dreamlike vision in their head about what it’s going to be like, but that can be far from reality. Here are 10 reasons to not move in with your boyfriend unless you’ve really thought it through.
It seems obvious, but as soon as you move in with your boyfriend your relationship will change because you now have to consider another person in your life. We all love having the ability to treat yo self once in while, but now you’ll be splitting the costs of a house, therefore you can’t just splurge on a pair of shoes because you have someone else to consider. Even though it will be great that your relationship is moving forward, always remember you’re going to be losing a bit of your independence to do what you want.
Even though your boyfriend is probably one of your best friends, it’s important to not forget about your girlfriends! Relationships take up a lot of your time, and your relationships with your friends might take a back burner, so if you’re living with your friends it makes it so much easier to spend time with them. Moving in with a boyfriend will make you miss late night chats with your girls and the convenience of seeing them at your home.
Living with your boyfriend will definitely bring you closer together as you become more comfortable with one another, but wearing granny knickers and an oversized PJ top with stains on it isn’t particularly sexy. When you’re not living together, you can still keep some mystery and the spark in your relationship. His mind can be left to the imagination as he wonders what underwear you’re wearing, as he won’t have been with you to see you pick.
This ties in with the previous point, but because you’re still trying to keep the spark and mystery alight, you’re more likely to put more effort into seeing each other and into your relationship. You have to make the time to see each other, rather than knowing you’re going to see them once you’ve got home. If you’re unsure, make sure you consider all of the reasons to not move in with your boyfriend before you make the decision.
The most exciting part of moving is redecorating right?! Well, it would be if it was just you who was picking everything, but it’s not. What if he wants to get leopard print bed sheets, which don’t go with the boho theme of your bedroom? You’re going to have to be willing to compromise on some things because it’s not just your place now.
You’re young, starting a career, living independently, the last thing you need is the stress of moving in with your boyfriend and the responsibilities that come with it. Before you make the commitment to your other half, remember this is the perfect opportunity to really focus on what you’re doing, and where you are in your life.
You might love the idea of being able to wake up and go to sleep next to your boyfriend every day, but having your own place means that you have your own space. Once you two are living together, you’re never going to have a place you can call only yours, and you’re never going to be able to have complete solitude again!
Some couples rush into moving in together because they feel that’s what can fix the relationship when it’s starting to break down. Really, this will only trap you more, as breaking up when you’re living together is so much more stressful than a general break up.
Don’t forget that when you’re not living with your boyfriend, you don’t have to worry about not being able to pay the bills, because you’re completely in control of your own money. Maybe your other half is bad with money, and you end up having to pay all the bills because he’s gone and spent all his earnings, or you end up being financially dependent on him, so if the relationship ended you would be cast out with no home to go to. Make sure you’re protecting yourself financially! This is one of the most important reasons to not move in with your boyfriend.
It’s easy to compare our relationships with other people, but make sure you don’t rush into anything before you’re truly ready. Once you’re married (which would be the next step after living together) you’ll have a lifetime to live with your partner, so you don’t have to rush into anything until you’re completely sure that you’re ready for that commitment.
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