I dated my best friend during my second year at university – it was an unfortunately short-lived relationship, but it taught me a lot about the somewhat confusing dynamic which occurs when two friends get together. It wasn’t planned (is it ever?) and it was a transition that didn’t come without its complexities. Going out with your best friend is nothing like the standard relationship protocol, and there are many pros and cons to consider before taking the plunge. You know you love them, they’re your best friend, but could that love translate into an intimate relationship? Here are 10 pros and cons to help you figure out if dating your best friend could be worth it!
There’ll be no awkward ‘getting to know each other’ questions, no tedious first dates, and no nasty surprises (hopefully). Odds are you already know everything about each other that’s worth knowing when you’re in a relationship with someone!
There are certain things we don’t mind a best friend knowing which we most definitely would not share with a boyfriend/girlfriend. The bad side of transitioning from friendship to romance is that they probably know a lot of the embarrassing things you’ve gotten away with in life, and they might not let you forget them…
Building up trust in a relationship can be a lengthy process, and it can take time to get to the stage where you feel completely comfortable around each other. Dating your best friend skips that sometimes awkward stage leaving you less to worry about in the progress of the relationship.
It’s impossible to start going out with your best friend and not have them treat you differently, as the whole dynamic of the relationship will change completely. This can be nice, but it also signifies that things are different now, and the way you felt around each other in the friendship stage might never recur.
Dating your best friend increases the likelihood of having friends in common, meaning you don’t need to go through the sometimes daunting progress of introducing them to your friendship circle. You all hang out together anyway!
This can be a really tricky one, because if things go south and you break up, your mutual friends are then placed in the horrible position of trying to keep both of you happy, post-break-up. They might end up feeling like they have to take sides, and it can get ugly.
A huge burden when you start a new relationship is introducing them to your family, but odds are your best friend has already met them and gained their seal of approval! Unless of course they’re like Chandler from Friends…then they might still need to work at getting the parents blessing.
There’s no avoiding it, things will feel weird at the beginning. You always viewed them as your best friend, and now all of the sudden the circumstances have changed, and you’re expected to display affection where you never thought you would. Sex will feel weird at first especially, but don’t be put off, give it time!
It’s a person’s duty to hope their best friend finds happiness and there’s no denying that you automatically feel good when they find it. Being the source of that happiness will make that feeling all the more rewarding and, even better, you’ll get to enjoy it together!
One of the things I struggled with while dating my best friend was that he was the one I would usually have turned to for relationship advice, and I couldn’t exactly continue asking him for guidance as he was the one I was dating!
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