10 Mistakes Everyone Makes In Long Distance Relationship Struggles
Successfully managing a long distance relationship may seem like a challenge, however it doesn’t have to be difficult. There are a number of things that you have to keep in mind to ensure that you and your partner are both happy. There is no need to exacerbate the struggles that come with a long distance relationship; not being able to see your partner is bad enough. In order to maintain a healthy connection, you have to be aware of these 10 mistakes that everyone makes in a long distance relationship. Check out our list to make sure that you keep your relationship strong by avoiding all of these unnecessary difficulties.
1. Disappearing after an argument
Arguments are an inevitable part of every relationship and they tend to be relatively easy to patch up, as long as you put your mind to it. One of the worst things that you could do is completely ignore your partner after you’ve had an argument, especially when it comes to a long distance relationship. Ditching social media and turning off your phone will not solve the problem. You should consider your partner’s feelings and give them the opportunity to continue speaking to you, even if you’re still mad at them. Shutting them off completely will only make things worse.
2. Lying to your partner about nights out
The topic of going out is treated differently by every couple – some people are completely comfortable with their partner going out, whereas others don’t feel too sure about it. Regardless of how you and your loved one treat nights out, it’s important to always be honest about them. Be sure to tell your partner in advance where you’ll be going, who’s coming with you, and what you’re planning on doing. If you don’t trust yourself to go out without your SO, then it’s best to just stay home.
3. Assuming you understand each other’s needs
Before you begin a long distance relationship, you should be on the same page with your partner about how often you’re going to talk. This is crucial because you will have to find time throughout your day to speak with your partner. Make sure to decide how often you’ll call, whether you’ll have video calls, and so on. The worst thing you could possibly do is try to make up a schedule as you go – this will inevitably lead to disagreements and misunderstandings.
4. Blaming each other for loss of time and sleep
Unfortunately some long distance relationships force you to deal with awkward time differences, which can often result in you having to make sacrifices in order to speak to your loved one. This may lead to loss of sleep or being unable to complete your daily tasks, in which case you will have to come up with a schedule that works for both you and your partner. However, you should never blame them for keeping you awake or waiting – it is not their fault that you’re in different time zones.
5. Letting your relationship take over your life
This applies to an ordinary relationship as well – you should always give yourself and your SO some space. Whether you want to pursue a hobby, hang out with family, or just get some work done, it’s important to have that free time in a long distance relationship. Just because you’re away from your partner does not mean that you should be spending all of your free time on Skype with them. What are you even going to talk about if you’re sat at home all day texting your loved one and not doing anything else?
6. Comparing your relationship to others
A long distance relationship is very different to an ordinary one, for obvious reasons. However, lots of people fall into the trap of comparing an LDR to other types of relationships. Just because you don’t see each other as often does not mean that you relationship is going to fail. There’s no point comparing it to a friend’s relationship, for instance. Everyone’s love life is different, so you should focus on your unique ties with your partner and stop trying to shape your relationship into something it’s not.
7. Always assuming the worst
There are many reasons why your partner my have failed to come online at a designated time. They may be having connectivity issues or may have been kept late at work or school. Don’t instantly assume that they’ve deliberately ditched you in order to do something else. Panicking or getting angry will not solve the problem; instead, try calling them on their phone to make sure they’re okay. Chances are, their internet is down or their Skype isn’t working.
8. Pretending that everything is fine when it’s not
Again, this also applies to standard relationships, but it’s especially important in long distance ones when you’re not always able to see and speak with your partner. You SO may not always be able to tell that something is wrong over the phone or through a text message, so you have to be open about your problems. Whether it directly concerns your relationship or if it’s about something else, you should tell your loved one what’s bothering you – they will definitely be able to lend an ear and try their best to help you.
9. Relying on one mode of communication
Calling and texting your partner is great, but why not get a bit more creative? Sending your loved one a postcard or a small gift is one of the best ways to remind them of your love and put a smile on their face. It’s even better when it’s done spontaneously! Your partner will definitely appreciate such a kind gesture, considering that there’s something very sweet about receiving a gift from your partner when you’re miles apart.
10. Listening to other people’s opinions
For some reason it is really common for people to berate and bring down long distance relationships. Everyone seems to be convinced that it either won’t work out or that your partner is going to cheat on you. It is important to filter out all of this negative information and not take it to heart. You know your relationship better than anyone else does and if you’re committed to it, then there’s no need to worry. Taking such nasty comments too seriously will only result in disappointment and arguments with your SO.
Which of these mistakes do you think is the worst? Do you have any other tips for keeping up a long distance relationship? Share your thoughts in the comments below!
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