Breakups are hard, everyone knows that, but messy breakups are harder. The old saying goes that the only thing that can fix a broken heart is time, but there are some methods you can use on how to handle a breakup and be the bigger person, which will ultimately lead to a happier, more content you.
If you’re obsessed with ‘winning’ the breakup, glowing up and getting with a far better guy than your ex was immediately, then you will find it very hard to get over your relationship. If all you think about is how to prove that you’re 100% okay and don’t care AT ALL what your ex thinks (whilst obsessively checking your Insta and Snapchat to see if they’ve checked your story yet), then all you’ll actually be thinking about is your ex. Instead, focus on you and the people who love you – hang out with your friends more, ditch the social media stalking and just have a good time to have a good time. This is really important when it comes to how to handle a breakup.
When you first get broken up with, all you want to do is sit in your pyjamas, cry and watch Netflix whilst binging on ice cream. Not that is isn’t a great plan (and I 100% encourage you to wallow for a little while), it can’t be the only thing you’re doing. Taking up a new hobby will distract you from the sad feelings and give you something that makes you even more special. My person recommendation? Playing the ukulele. You can’t play sad songs on the ukulele (believe me, I tried), so you’ll be forced to look at fun, happy songs whilst trying to form chords, so your brain will be just too busy to think about that certain someone.
By your stuff, I mean both the physical and the stuff that’s online – when you feel ready (i.e. will not have a sobbing breakdown over the fact that they left a sock at yours), go through your things and get rid of anything that reminds you of them. If you want to do a full cleanse (I will admit, I have never done this), then delete all the pictures you have together and block them on all social media. Completely cutting them out of your life can be beneficial as it means that they are out of sight, out of mind – although, be warned, it might be a bit of a nasty shock if you unexpectedly see them out and about. If you’re someone who needs this though, then go ahead. This is one of the most important steps on how to handle a breakup!
John Tucker Must Die and The Other Woman are great films, but do bear in mind that they are just films. Whilst the idea of breaking your ex’s heart like they broke yours, spiking their food with laxatives or causing their hair to fall out by mixing Nair into their shampoo might sound like the best idea ever, they won’t actually do anything in the long run. Same with making out with their best mate, burning their clothes or telling everyone that one thing they were super embarrassed about when you were together. Instead, be the bigger person, take a deep breath and just watch the films instead – don’t try and make them into real life.
Acceptance is the best medicine when it comes to broken hearts, which does such when you feel incredibly wronged and as though you will never come again. However, acceptance will come, and once you accept that a.) you’re single, b.) you and your ex aren’t going to get back together and c.) there is no such thing as ‘winning’ a breakup, then you’ll be in a far better place than when you first broken up with. In addition, with this acceptance comes inner peace, and once you have accepted this, you’ll be in the position to move on – and even start dating again, if that’s what you’d like.
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