10 Things You’ll Never Hear A James Madison University Student Say

These are things you will never hear a James Madison University student say…ever. Check out these James Madison University student sayings:

1. “I love when there are no seats at Carrier!”

The best feeling after trudging out of a tough class on a Monday afternoon is to enter Carrier Library and fail to find an empty chair. What’s even better is the lovely sight of a single person sitting at a table with their things strewn about to give off the illusion that they aren’t taking up a whole table.

2. “I love getting tickets every day!”

Don’t you love getting to your car at the end of a long school day and seeing that infamous small white scrap of paper under your windshield wipers? The James Madison University Parking officials just can’t resist the adrenaline rush of gliding their pen across that pad, tearing off the slip and leaving it ever-so-gingerly on your dash for you to find later on.

3. “The bikers don’t get close enough to me!”

Whoosh. Zoom. You’re walking merrily to class when a fellow Duke flies by you on their bike, just narrowly missing your backpack. Instead of maneuvering through the wide open space on either side of you, your classmate can’t resist getting as close as possible…Virginia is for lovers after all.

4. “I hope they are training employees at Dukes, so the lines are long!”

One thing I will commend James Madison University Dining for is their impeccable timing. They always know the right times to train their newest employees — like right in the middle of the daily lunch rush. As if the throngs of people blocking any and every item of food in Dukes weren’t enough, the freshly hired staff members start their first shifts at noon on weekdays — when the entire student body is trying to get in and out in fifteen minutes. This means that the checkout lines snake all the way around the building and take at least ten minutes out of your day.

5. “There should be more tours!”

After spending the majority of your travel time in between classes in the cluster that is PC Dukes, only fate would have it that you get caught in the mix of a tour group. Starry-eyed parents, followed by their reluctant high school sons and daughters, love congregating in the middle of the quad to gaze at our beautiful campus. Bobbing and weaving among these people is like a little game — will I make it to my accounting test on time? It’s fun.

6. “I wish more people would walk four across the sidewalk!”

If you aren’t lucky enough to run into a tour group in between classes, you maybe — just maybe— will get to experience the beauty that is the four-across walkway debacle. When you are sprinting from Godwin to Forbes in fifteen minutes, the most glorious sight is three or four students walking horizontally across the sidewalk. You wouldn’t want them to interrupt their leisurely conversation to let you through, would you?

7. “I hope they never fix the air conditioning in the Village!”

When I look back on my days in the Village, so many great memories come to mind, the strongest being the way James Madison University students really lets you enjoy nature in its rawest form. They do this, of course, by doing away with air conditioning in the warmer months of the year. We all like sweating in our sleep anyway, right?

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8. “This Wi-Fi is fucking awesome!”

Another great memory from living on campus has to be the fantastic Wi-Fi connection. I could give so many anecdotes from my experience with the internet connection at this school, but the best has to be when I had to submit a written assignment on Canvas in a text box. I was typing away for three hours and was finally on my last sentence when the Wi-Fi gods decided I needed a little more Spanish practice. The internet restarted itself, and I got the chance to rewrite my assignment. 🙂

9. “I love that food places on campus are never open when I expect them to be!”

It seems as though whenever I want Mongolian or a panini Top Dog is closed. Whenever I’m feeling fit, fab and fun, my quinoa bowl dreams are crushed by SSC’s operating hours. Don’t even get me started on the Starbucks truck closing at a different time every day.

10. “I wish I went to another school.”

Despite JMU’s flaws, it really is a magical place. The lack of AC and faulty Wi-Fi are nothing compared to the memories students make here. James Madison University students may have difficulties, but we wouldn’t change this place for the world.

Let us know what you think about James Madison University in the comments below!

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