10 Things That Run Through Your Mind Before Deciding To Talk To A Guy
Everyone needs help when it comes to dating and knowing how to talk to a guy. We need that extra boost of confidence or security to allow us to do our best. When it comes to dating everyone has found themselves to be clueless at one point or another. We find ourselves in situations in which we do not know what’s the wisest thing to do or we simply feel silly for having the thoughts that we do have. But having a crush on someone is absolutely normal and it can happen even when you’re not looking for someone special.
1. What is his name?
Mystery and wonder are what initially makes a person interesting. Who is this person? Let your imagine run wild. There is a very special, vulnerable and emotional surrender that comes with being at awe with a complete stranger. We as human and literally depend on human connection for our survival. We are curious by nature and we long to know what is out there. All things in the universe have an existence even though they might not have a name. Someone’s name is the first thing that we are naturally curious to know.
Start off by being casual, calm but still making sure you show interest.
2. What can I talk about?
The most nerve racking things to do and what is considered the most important part of social etiquette is to start a conversation. Socially anxious people will know by heart the anxiety that comes from overthinking. What do I say? What can we talk about? There are of course the generic things that can be talked about such as how is the weather, what are you getting to drink, or how your day is going. The most important thing we think about is how can you make the most of this encounter. It is important that you make a connection through conversation so as to allow yourself to get known and know the person you are interested in.
As a word of advice I would suggest talking about your interests as a way to get things started. It is a much easier and practical alternative instead of having to guess what someone is thinking or likes. It will demonstrate boldness, uniqueness, and initiative to start off a conversation talking about the things you like.
Hobbies are that which we dedicate your time, effort and passion.
3. Will I make a fool of myself?
Self-consciousness is a learned behavior that is normal when balanced but can be a very toxic thing when it grows to be too much. When worrying about whether someone is secretly being critical or negative about you starts to become too much of a priority it starts to become toxic. You definitely do not want to sell yourself short simply because you are worried about coming off as a fool. A big part of this comes from a sense of low self-esteem and/or lack of confidence. There could truly be no way of you getting rid of your lack of confidence overnight because it is a very complex thing. The only way of helping you get through this initial part is by being aware of your awkwardness or nerves. Because it is not always a guarantee that you will be able to do whatever you imagine yourself doing, but it is necessary that you take a risk. You will never know if you do not try. Realistically speaking there is a very slim chance of the person you are trying to talk to will tell you that you are being a fool unless that person is a jerk. As they say “you are your own worst enemy” so be kind to yourself and forget about your negative thoughts.
Courage is what is needed when stepping into the unknown.
4. Is he busy or not?
A situation may arrive in which you can run into your crush at the wrong time. You never know what someone might be going through so it is important to try to be considerate of potential timing issues. If this is the case, make sure that if you feel your crush is not as enthusiastic as you might be that you try to discern the situation correctly. The last thing you would want to do is stop from giving your crush attention because you believe they are not interested but in reality they might be. Though it is important to be considerate of your interest’s time or life, it is also necessary to be aggressive with making your first impression. Therefore, it is good to not worry so much about it.
Though we live in a busy world everyone needs a simple hello to brighten up there day.
5. Am I making the right decision?
There is never a way to know if it is a right decision to talk to someone without first giving the person a try. It is good to keep in mind during this time in which you are trying to figure out if you are making the right decision. However, this choice should never be based on your own self-doubt. Do not decide not to talk to a guy because you think he will not like you back. You should instead base your decision on how interested you are in this person.
Remember, it is always important that you listen to your heart.
6. Is he interested in someone else?
Of course, everyone’s timelines are different. Not everyone is going to be on the same page. No one wants to hear that their affection and interest is not reciprocated because that would be heartbreaking. But this should not be something you are thinking about before you talk to your interest. It is completely self-sabotaging to do these kinds of things because it would not move anything forward. It is necessary to be aware that your special someone might already have a partner or might simply not be interested in you. But in theory anything is possible so always make sure you take give your crush a chance.
Take time to get to know others and let others get to know you.
7. How can I play it cool?
Nerves are natural so it best to embrace these nerves and use them as fuel to keep moving forward.
Keep in mind that everything passes and if things do not go as planned at least you have gained experience.
8. Am I interested enough to make the first move?
One of the most memorable things in life is when you make your first move on your crush. It is important to know that it is okay to dream a little bit and let yourself get taken away by the butterflies in your stomach. As the saying goes, “Take time to smell the roses” because these are the things life is made out of. The important part is that you are aware that things cannot go as planned so as to get rid of any potential disappointment. No everyone is going to reciprocate your romantic interests but of course there are plenty fishes in the sea.
Chemistry is one of the most vital things in a relationship because it keeps the energy flowing.
9. Am I currently emotionally open if my interest shows to reciprocate my attention?
Ready dig deep and ask yourself, “am I ready for a relationship right now?” This is to say will you be willing to start a relationship with someone if things do turn out smoothly? Ask yourself have you gotten over any previous heartbreak and do you have the time to commit?
Be aware that you might run into someone who might want to jump straight into a romantic relationship.
10. If this time does not work, will there be another chance?
How tragic, when your crush leaves an hour too early or simply does not make himself as available. The best way to prevent “what ifs” is to go for it when you can.
