10 Things Parents Should Know About Anxiety
Depression and anxiety are largely stigmatized issues centered around mental health. Here is a list of 10 things parents should know about anxiety. These are the things I wish my parents knew about my struggle with anxiety:
“Sometimes the mind is a terrible place.”
1. Its not your fault
Its not your fault and it will never be your fault. You guys are the best so please don’t blame yourselves, it will only make things worse.
2. I overthink everything
Everyday; I overthink every decision, every move, and every situation I’m in. I obsess over everything: why I didn’t get a text back, why my friends are ignoring me today, why my boss didn’t smile at me, If I said the wrong thing, etc. The thoughts consume me throughout the day and I become irritated and nervous. I may come off as rude but please bear with me, sometimes I can’t do it alone and I need you to be next to me to calm me down.
3. Getting out of bed is an accomplishment
I don’t get that much sleep. Every time I close my eyes, I feel like I’m in a jail cell and on the walls of the jail cell are thoughts of worst case scenarios that can happen the next day and It replays over and over and over again. I wake up feeling tired and exhausted not wanting to get out of bed, but also not wanting to close my eyes. That’s my typical l morning everyday. A “good morning”, a smile, or a good morning text if you guys are out of the country will always brighten up my day. This is one of the most important things parents should know about anxiety.
4. Have patience
Decisions are difficult for me and sometimes it takes me a long time to make a decision. It doesn’t matter if its picking out a shirt to wear that day, mentally rehearsing “good morning”, or to pick college to go to, I have to have time to think about it and to also collect my thoughts afterwards. What’s difficult but doable for most people is nearly impossible for me. Please don’t rush me. I feel like a child when you guys rush me and all I want to be is a normal, functioning 23 year old.
5. Sometimes I want to be left alone
Sometimes my anxiety level gets really high and I need to lock myself in my room for hours, maybe even days. I don’t know why its happening but I need to figure myself out and I need you guys to understand that I’m not ignoring you. I just don’t want to be around anybody for now because its just too overwhelming for me. But when I’m ready to talk, please listen.
6. It just happens
There will be days when it just happens and I don’t know why. Thoughts will just start flooding my mind anytime, anywhere. The less I think, the worse it gets, the more I think, the worse it gets. Its like being trapped in own mind with no way out surrounded by people talking about your past and future failures. Please be there when it happens.
7. Just because I can function, doesn’t mean I’m cured
I’ve had anxiety for years now. I learned when it will be the highest, what triggers it, what I can do to about it, and also adapted to it. I can pull a perfect presentation, shake hands with my colleagues, show up to work with a positive/smile on my face, and be sociable; but deep down, I am completely overwhelmed. I learned how to hide it but I can only hide it for so long. Please be there when I cant hide it anymore.
8. Take care of yourselves
It hurts me to see you guys worrying about me. All the sleepless nights, working late hours, waking up in the dawn can take a toll. I want you guys to experience what I experience when my anxiety is at the lowest. Please look after yourself so you can look after other things. This is one of those things parents should know about anxiety!
9. Anxiety will not stop me
I may not be able to cure it, but I will do everything I can to control it; promise to live my life to the fullest and to accomplish everything in my bucket list. I promise to make my dreams come true and I want you guys to be there right next to me experiencing it with me.
10. Thank you
I want to thank you guys for being there for me. Thank you for being there when I was suffering with depression because I technically failed my first semester of nursing school to all of the anxiety attacks suffered through after my several failed nursing exams that led to the happy tears that fell from our eyes when I walked the stage to receive my nursing pin and the RN after our last name…..thank you mom and dad for everything.