Online dating; it is the easiest and most convenient way of meeting people in today’s era! Let’s be honest, it can be really hard and frustrating trying to meet boys and plan dates when out of the college social zone and entering adult-work life. Having apps like Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge can serve for finding a relationship or can simply be a fun way to go on casual dates with people! There are multiple reasons why people try online dating and it can have both pros and cons; here are a few!
It might sound weird, but going on multiple dates with different guys can be a great way to figure out what sort of person you are into and what you would want in a more serious partner down the road! Look at it as a process of elimination. If it didn’t work out with one guy, there is likely another just waiting to go on a date with you! On these apps, you tend to match with multiple people, so just go meet them all and see who you click with!
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Because you meet people in the virtual world, you most likely won’t feel that natural connection until you see them face to face. It can also make you feel desperate and weird at times just swiping away until you match, like trying to force something to happen instead of letting fate do its job.
Introvert. Extrovert. Dry. Awkward. The Fun Guy. Player. Jock. You get to see all kinds of personalities when talking to and meeting different guys! You may not even know what kind of personalities you really click with until you meet them! On these apps, people can put pictures of themselves as well as a brief bio so viewers automatically have a basic idea if this would be a person they would be into and compatible with!
Bio may say they are 25 but this guy turns out to be 20. A guy may look classy AF in photos but in reality is “here for a good time, not a long time”. The convo may be going really well through messages but when you meet in person it is super awkward. This can be a major con when it comes to online dating because you can literally be anyone you want to be with a touch of photo shop or poetic talents.
Expectation:
Reality:
Jet skiing, skydiving, roller coasters, dancing, you name it! Sometimes you can go on really fun dates with these guys! It only takes some effort and planning. It doesn’t always have to be the typical “let’s go to Starbucks” (although I highly recommend a public place like this when meeting for the first time).
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A big con to online dating is inconstancy and flakiness. You may hit it off in the beginning but a lot of these guys tend to either: forget to respond, choose to not respond, wait on you to respond first, don’t respond due to talking to other girls, or just ghost altogether. Probably the most annoying is the flakiness; when you plan a date and they don’t follow through. Thank you, next.
Having a Tinder may have that bad rep of being “the hookup app” and others like Bumble or Hinge may be known as “the relationship app”. The great thing about online dating is that you can choose and make it clear about what you’re looking for. If someone wants a hookup, usually that is specified pretty quickly. If you want to take it slow and see where it goes, that is totally fine too! Many apps like Bumble also let you be more specific on indicating what you want and allows you to search for people who want the same thing.
Sometimes online dating can be a drag and a can feel like string of disappointments. You keep going on these dates and nothing really clicks with anyone or you just keep running into weirdos. Some guys may be those desperate annoying ones or want just hookups from you. It is unfortunately a trial and error experience.
A lot of people in their twenties use dating apps to find their boyfriends or just to meet more boys. It isn’t anything to be ashamed of even though it does have that weird first reaction. Many find their future spouses and get really lucky! Worst case scenario, if you decide that the online dating world isn’t for you, at least you got some funny stories or even just more experience out of these dates.
Kind of a big con of online dating is that many boys unfortunately use these apps to get laid plain and simple. They only see girls as an easy booty call; for many it can make them feel like an object and not a person that they want to get to know. Remember what I said about being able to talk to multiple people? Well this can also be a problem: boys talking to multiple girls. You may not feel like you are his first (or even second choice) because you never know who else this guy is flirting with! It doesn’t hurt to ask if he is talking to anyone else though, or what his intentions are with this process.
It may seem kinda shallow but if you get absolutely nothing else out of the online dating world, at least you get a major ego boost with all the likes, comments, and matches you can get! Even if you run into those typical players that only like you due to looks, at least you know you’ll be just fine in or out of the online dating market! So just have fun with it!
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