Relationships are not easy. They take work. In the words of one of my precious idols, Eartha Kitt, relationships have to been earned. I am paraphrasing of course; she said some other good stuff too about the subject. Nevertheless, each of you must put in the RIGHT work for one another and then you’ll forget about yourselves.
When one person blames the other for what they are not doing for them, a heated argument can take place and vice versa. This happens many, many times in relationships and it is totally a waste of energy. I know you may feel frustrated at times when your needs aren’t being totally met, but I ask you, are doing right by the other to the extent of YOUR love? You see, as long as what you are doing is right, like catering to their needs and giving all your love and attention to them, it shouldn’t matter. You know you are doing the right thing, or are you? If one of you is becoming distant or the relationship is lop-sided then you are doing something wrong (the both of you)! Remember to do your part in the relationship. Once you give the other person your all, it’s only natural for them to reciprocate that.
Another factor to remember while in a relationship is to remember that you’re not going to be in love all the time. For those that have been in long term relationships or marriages, you know what I am talking about. There are going to be days where you are not going to like your significant other. It is all normal. But, let’s not confuse with not liking them for not loving them. Days like the ones I just spoke of are temporary whereas love is everlasting.
In a relationship, you need to remember that you are two people that need space. Being together on the daily basis can take a toll on your mental believe it or not. You tend to irritated quicker or annoyed by the person that is constantly in your house. Sometimes, you feel that you just want to get away for a while. This is totally necessary and normal. Have you ever heard of the saying, “absence makes the heart grow stronger”? You each need to learn to take some time to yourself. That does not mean you need to break up, it just means to maybe take a girl’s trip and go out on a weekend with your boys. You will come back and be happy and relieved to see your partner.
You must be patient with the other person. There was something that brought the two of you together. Whatever it may be, do not lose sight of that. You must remember that you two are totally two different people as well; different personalities, strengths, weaknesses, corks, and perks. There is bound to be something in your partner that you do not agree with. First of all, you need to respect those differences and accept that you two have different views. If it’s an opinion that you just can’t live with, so what. People’s minds change. They are with you because they want too!
In a relationship, you must remember there are going to be some hard times. However, there are going to be some good days as well. Sticking together through the hard ones really shows how committed to the relationship you are. If you truly love this person, the hard times will be a challenge, but it will seem like a breeze because of who you’re with. Everyone loves good days. When you’re the happiest with one another, laughing and hanging out like two teenagers… it is reminded to you in that time why you’re together. Let not the rough days overlap the good.
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