On December 22, 2020, Reddit user u/TheAllNewBigGay asked fellow Redditors who are part of the r/AskReddit Community, “Whats the craziest crime you or somebody in your family has committed?” In an instant, the Reddit thread went quickly viral and as of January 21, 2021, has over 22,300 responses.
Now, with all of that information being said, let’s take a look the following 15 Stories of People Sharing The Craziest Crime He/She or Someone in Their Family Committed:
“My grandfather’s father was a mean, abusive, hateful drunk, who would come home from working in the mines long enough to terrorize his children and impregnate his wife and then leave again for mine work. He tried to set the house on fire, with wife and kids (13 of them) inside…twice. One day my grandfather and a couple of his siblings were picking berries across the road from the house and his drunk father started taking potshots at them with a rifle. My grandpa, one brother, and his oldest sister took off running for the house with the agreement that the first one there would kill him (their father). My grandpa’s sister got there first and shot him to death. She was never charged with a crime, due to her age and the fact that everyone knew my great grandfather was a mean son of a bitch and had it coming.
ETA: wow, my most upvoted comment is about my family’s fucked up history lol
Edit #2: thank you all so much for the awards! Also, RIP inbox lol
Edit #3: Since some of y’all think it’s fake here’s some proof. https://imgur.com/a/5PHfZqQ“
-Redditor flygirl083
“My father committed one of the first computer crimes in the 90s. A ton of files were corrupted due to a code he created because they fired him. FBI invaded our home and arrested him. Was sent to federal prison for four years, which was interesting because there was never a crime committed of its nature before. They made a forensics file episode about it
Edit: if anyone is curious, the company was Omega.”
-Redditor drawing_a_blank1
“Not my family, but a close friend’s brother.
He decided to steal a canoe from Dick’s Sporting Goods by literally walking out the front door while carrying it over his head. None of the employees said anything to him, because who would think someone would actually steal a canoe so blatantly?”
-Redditor ThatPancakeMix
“Cousin was taking care of a woman in coma. He raped her. Little he knew was that her parents had set a webcam to check regularly if she would wake up…
He deserved every single day he spends in prison.”
-Redditor Nmuncer
“My dad told me he once snuck into a tire warehouse, he cut the alarm and came in through a window on the roof, and stole a bunch of tires.”
-Redditor robtk12
“My Nana is a pill addict and she orders her pills from this very sketchy website, pretty sure she doesn’t know how to use the dark web but she some how found something to send her them. So when I was living with her the cops showed up to our door and I’m like.. what the hell did my dad do now. Turns out they were looking for the “little old lady” im like WHAT.. turns out she went to the post office to pick up her pills and they were closed.. she got so angry about it that she broke the window and assaulted the front desk lady who was closing to try to let her get her mail. She’s also really racist so bc the front desk lady was black and this was during blm, she thought the store being closed was racist so she was calling this girl just doing her job racial slurs.. I also have an aunt who tried to murder her husband with a butcher knife .. and a schizo cousin who called the president and said he was gonna kill him he’s in prison now. My family is f***ed up.”
-Redditor coursehp
“I worked at a movie theatre when Back To The Future was originally released. We used to take the entire movie ticket instead of tearing them and re-sell them to the next group coming in. The old theatre was massive. Sat 600 people. We probably made about $15k between two of us in month or so. Adjusted for inflation, it’s about $37k. We were the richest high school kids in our town.”
-Redditor frick-you-fricker
“My cousins killed a bunch of their neighborhood pets and threw them up in trees, then when most of them were dead they went to the woods with left over pet corpses and made a ritual thinking their “god” (whoever it was) was going to praise them and they would be the new gods of ‘death,living,hell,and heaven.’ Yeah, that was a really long time ago, but its still really weird and freaky.”
-Redditor Klaus_Hicks
“My grandfather maintained a massive meth lab in my hometown for years. When they reported it in the local newspaper it was by far the largest they had ever taken down.
He got out of prison and started another one, it blew up and he blasted one of his testicles off.
He did it a third time and that one blew up too. But he died that time.
Interestingly enough he owned a backhoe and had taught me how to drive it and how to use the “scoopy thing” and i dont know the details but in his early life he invented a lens that improved telescopes.”
-Redditor Foxes_Dream
“A cousin of mine had seriously uncontrolled Bipolar Disorder. His girlfriend tried to break up with him, he tried to kill her. Allegedly, he only accidentally hurt her at first but thought she would get him put in jail for hurting him so because he was in a manic state he…. tried to stomp her to death. She lived, but I can’t say that her quality of life is worth having lived through it. He’s in jail (not sure why it isn’t a mental institution) for life. I think there is an eventual chance for parole.
Years after this happened my mother asked me if he had ever been inappropriate to me when we were children (I think he’s like 6-7 years older than me) because some of my cousins revealed he has touched them. (I’m not sure if it’s true or not, it was never talked about again.)
It’s a really messed up dark family secret.”
-Redditor stephaniecaseys
“An uncle robbed a bank (or was an accessory to the robbers, idk). His brilliant escape when the police showed up was to go to the roof and jump off. He didn’t do time, just had to go to the hospital for a broken leg. I’ll have to ask my mom when I get a chance, she knows the story better than I do.”
-Redditor AsbestosForLunch
“Great Uncle is a sweet man who gave me cuddly toys and chocolates every day I saw him.
He also:
was a thug, part of a Birmingham gang. He was the guy who broke fingers if you didn’t pay the gang on time. Used to wonder round with a blood-soaked baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire.
entered the army, then decided it wasn’t for him and went AWOL. Hid in random houses for months until they caught him. He went to prison for that.
my aunt, (his sister’s child), had an abusive boyfriend. My aunt came home sobbing with a black eye one day. The next week, the boyfriend was in hospital, black and blue. Every bone in his left arm and hand were broken. We can’t prove anything, but all the family knows it was my great uncle.”
-Redditor dmmestars
“Aparantly one of my distant relatives is in hiding for trying to smuggle 1200 kilos of cocaine into Canada.”
-Redditor illgivethisa
“My grandfather’s cousin stabbed a waiter to death because he wouldn’t let him use the employees-only restroom in his restaurant.”
-Redditor willywag
“My friend got blackout drunk and stole a bulldozer that had the keys left in it.
He turned it on and obviously didn’t know how to drive it so he just ended up making the scoopy part go up and down for a bit before the cops came.
They actually let him go too.”
-Redditor datacollect_ct
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