20 Signs You’re Actually Egyptian
Being Egyptian comes with a close knit family and some of the best traditions. From strict parents to the serious belief in superstitions, these are the 20 signs you’re actually Egyptian!
1. Your parents control your life.
That’s right. No parties, no leaving the house without permission, no sleepovers, no nothing. Stay home, study, be good.
2. You can’t leave the house in shorts.
No, you must be modest. Even when swimming, you must wear a skirt with your one-piece swimsuit.
3. Others think you’re arguing with someone when you’re simply chatting on the phone.
If you’ve every heard Egyptians talking on the phone, then you know that every word that comes out of their mouth sounds like a death threat when in actuality, they’re probably just saying hello.
4. “Ensha Allah” means never.
This is definitely not a good sign when you ask for something and your mom tells you “Ensha Allah” (God willing), she actually means Never, not even in your wildest dreams.
5. Your entire family lives in one ten story building and counting.
If you’ve ever lived or been to Egypt, you know that when a man gets married, another story is added to the already three story home. The children then grow up with their uncles and grandparents downstairs. However, if you’re a girl and you’re getting married, you don’t get to live with your family anymore. You’d have to move in with your husband’s newly renovated one story (on top of a hundred others) home.
6. You run on Egyptian time.
Have a scheduled conference at 3:30 today? How about we show up at 4:30 tomorrow and call it a day! If you’re Egyptian, you’re never on time to anything.
7. Macarona Bashamel is the root of all evil.
If you’ve ever tried this delicious food, you’d know that it is the most delicious food of all time. It’s made with 50 pounds of butter, 40 pounds of beef, 30 liters of chicken broth, a load ton of macaroni and a delicious sauce that only your mother knows how to make.
8. Your parents want to pay for everything.
Get a job? Not today, your parents want you to stay home, study, get a good job so you can live a good life. They will literally pay for eveYorything: debt, medical school, a new car. Money is no object to them, even when you’re married and have kids.
9. Your middle name is your father’s name.
Every child your parents have will have the exact same middle name. Hany Nashed Ibrahim. Marina Nashed Ibrahim. Mark Nashad Ibrahim. That’s just the way it is.
10. You bargain everything, even if the price is set.
“Can I get this $300 purse for $150?”
11. It’s rude to not accept food.
You’re at an Egyptian friend’s house and their mother comes in with three bowls of molokhia, rice, and cooked chicken but you ate before you came, no other option but to eat again.
12. Your cholesterol levels are off the charts.
As Egyptians, meat is the main part of a healthy meal. Three pieces of chicken, four barbecued ribs, and a whole cow make up a very nutritious diet.
13. You eat things that other people think are weird.
Cow tongue, yummy. Sheep brain, delicious. Doves, amazing. Rabbits, probably the best of all.
14. Superstition is a key factor in being Egyptian.
If you drop food while your eating, you have been cursed and someone had been eyeing your food the whole time.
15. Marriage is before dating.
My parents never dated. My dad heard about my mom and he went to her house and asked for her parent’s permission to wed her. They went on two dates as an engaged couple, were married within six months, and have been married for nineteen years.
16. Gossip is in your blood.
All Egyptians love to talk about other people. Just grab some leb (sunflower seeds) and some shay (tea) and sit with your fifty friends and discuss the very important matter that is that woman’s cheap shoes.
17. Girls are guys are from two different planets.
At church, girls are on the right, boys are on the left. Girls only talk to girls. Boys only talk to boys.
18. A test determines your life.
In Egyptian, at the end of sanaweya gamha (high school), everyone takes a career test and whatever you score is what you have to be.
19. You hope to win the lottery.
The lottery in Egypt is completely different from an American lottery. In Egypt, if your family wins, you get the opportunity to go to the USA, the land of opportunity, the land of the free, the land of debt.
20. Finally, you know how to have fun.
Egyptians are loud and definitely know how to throw a party.
Do you have any other signs you’re Egyptian!? Share in the comments below!
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