Hispanic families have raised their children the same way for several generations. Even Hispanics from different countries around the world are raised with the same idiosyncrasies and often with a sick sense of humor. Warning: some of the following points may sound out of the ordinary to anyone who is not Latino. Below are 15 signs you are Hispanic!
You definitely eat 12 uvas* on New Years for good luck and happiness throughout the 12 months of the year. Oh and don’t forget the yellow underwear and lentejas* for prosperity, and running with a maleta* for numerous safe travels. If you don’t do these things, I promise your life will fall apart that next year.
God forbid you even seem like you’re going to misbehave in public. Hispanic moms DO NOT play. No child wants to hear the words “vamos al baño”* come out of their mom’s mouth.
Hispanic moms like to take action when you’re in trouble, it’s much more than just yelling. Also, if you get smacked with a chancleta*, DO NOT cry BUT still show remorse. It’s confusing but abide by this or get smacked again.
For some reason, Noche Buena* is more important and more fun than Christmas Day for Hispanics. On Noche Buena we feast: we break out the arroz con frijoles* and la caja china!* It’s a pachanga.* This is also the time where everyone in the family will ask “¿y el novio?”*
This is NOT a joke. Hispanics have not registered the concept of being on time.
According to Hispanics, Vicks VapoRub can cure virtually anything. From a cold to diarrhea, “vi vaporu” will do.
Spanglish has truly become many people’s primary language, especially for the older generation of Hispanics. It combines the English and Spanish vocabulary and often create new words, such as, printear for printing. FYI, that is not a word in the Spanish language.
When you’re Hispanic, everyone is your primo*. You can have a Tio* Bobby and a Tia* Margarita that you’ve only met twice, and somehow, they all changed your diapers and took care of you when you were little.
In a Hispanic household, the floor could be spotless and your mom will find a little speck and tell you that you never cleaned and you’re grounded. Don’t EVER tell your Hispanic mother that you’re bored or relaxing.
If there is an extremely minuscule piece of food leftover on your plate, it is assumed there is something wrong with you. Also, if your plate isn’t spotless, your grandparents probably won’t let you drink anything because they think it’ll fill you up and you won’t eat.
According to abuelita*, if you go to sleep with el pelo mojado*, you’ll die. You definitely cannot go in the pool right after you eat because your stomach will paralyze you and you’ll drown.
We Hispanics just naturally have a louder volume when we speak than the average human. This typically comes with pride of being Latino.
Going to dinner with a Hispanic family is practically impossible. I don’t know half of my cousins, but I do know that I have hundreds of primos y primas in Cuba, Ecuador and Spain. I probably have them all on Facebook.
As a Latino/a, you are expected to be dancing in the womb. Otherwise, you’re the outcast and are questioned even by other ethnicities.
Leaving home for college is rough, depending on where you go, because there usually are no Hispanic restaurants in college towns. Going too many days without croquetas* is a crime.
*Spanish to English Translation*
*Uvas: grapes
*Lentejas: lentils
*Maleta: luggage
*Vamos al baño: let’s go to the bathroom
*Chancleta: flip flop
*Noche Buena: Christmas Eve
*Arroz con frijoles: rice and beans
*Caja china: a box with a whole or half a pig that is roasted for parties
*Pachanga: party
*Novio: boyfriend
*Primo/a: cousin
*Abuelita: grandma
*Pelo mojado: wet hair
*Croquetas: fried food roll containing a main ingredient inside
*Caldo: broth
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