Finding the right dorm room furniture can be a hassle, as sharing a tiny living space with a stranger who’s similarly not yet fully formed is under-precedented in human society. You might need a nudge in the right direction. Here are 15 suggestions to help you furnish the small box of anxiety and farts which you will inhabit for the foreseeable future.
You’re going to need some place to sit other than your bed, and if your room has the space for it, why not make it a bean bag chair? Bean bag chairs will suck you in and leave unrivaled butt prints. College is the time in your life in which you really begin to leave your mark on society, but if you don’t get there right away, you can at least be sure you’ve left an impression on something.
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It’s no coincidence that this desk lamp looks like a shower head. You’ll be showering yourself with light and knowledge with this on your desk. You won’t always be able to rely on your room lighting. If you’re pulling an all night study session while your roommate is trying to sleep, this is your best bet. You don’t want to be a bad roommate. Next thing you know they’ll start moving all your stuff by only about an inch every single day, observing with maniacal laughter as you slowly go insane. You don’t want that.
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Until the concept of an ottoman is introduced to you for the first time in your life, you’ve never really understood the void that existed. Ottomans just make too much sense. It’s a seat, it’s a foot rest, and it’s a storage container. Many of the items on this list prioritize space efficiency, as you’ll need to cram as much as possible into a very small space. You can read up about the Ottoman Empire while sitting on your ottoman and reflect on the circle of life.
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Unless you get tremendously lucky, there’s a good chance you’ll have to use the public bathroom for all of your hygienic needs. When you transport your various products to and from the shower, you don’t want to be schlepping them around with your bare hands. You need to keep those free for holding up your towel or hiding your face in shame. Maybe that last one is a little too personal. Still, with a storage cart, you may look a little bit like a snitch pushing that thing around, but you’ll be glad you have it.
College isn’t all pleasure, all the time. Sometimes it’s business. If there’s any room at all in your dorm, you’ll want an office chair. How else are you going to write those late night delirium injected papers? In a regular chair? No way. You’ll want something cheap, though, as you’re almost surely not going to be sitting in it properly anyway.
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Listen, body pillows aren’t just for pregnant people and lonely anime fans. Quality sleep is hard to come by in college for a plethora of reasons, so you’d be wise to do everything in your power to aid your rest. It’s debatable whether or not a body pillow qualifies as furniture, but it’s going to take just as much abuse as your mattress anyway.
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These are the cute little cousins of the ottomans. Notice the lowercase spelling there. That would take on a very different meaning if it were uppercase. Once again, you need to be efficient with your space. You could just discard everything into piles on the floor, which can be a great and valid method of organization, but if you’re not careful, things can spiral out of control. Next thing you know you’ll have a rat king on your hands, but instead of rats it’s packages of Ramen and travel size sticks of deodorant.
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The line between laziness and innovation is razor thin. If you need a little extra space with which to work from your bed, or if you want to hover over your bunkmate in cozy surveillance, then look no further.
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If there’s one thing to take away from all this, it’s that space, much like life, is fleeting. We must make the most of it while we still can, because it’s really all we’ve got. It’s fickle and suffocating. You can never have too much, nor can you ever have enough.
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Our lives are tethered to outlets. Nothing feels right if all your electronics aren’t fully charged. You’re not fully charged. Buying a power strip is perhaps the most boring thing you can possibly think of, but it sure does make you feel like you’re all grown up. You’ve got one foot in the grave and one fork in the socket.
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You’re probably going to want some cute lighting to really set your room apart, and you’ll be over the moon with this piece. There should be some sort of FBI watch list for obligatory yet terrible puns like that. It simply wrote itself. Do we ever have truly original thoughts, or are we doomed by our conditioning to only regurgitate? Buy this cute light.
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Back at it again with another one. Closet space is precious. Where else are you going to keep all those skeletons?
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Is the crushing weight of the entire rest of your life not enough for you? Do you want to feel like you’re being buried alive every night? Do you wish to be swaddled like a baby? You’ll never feel more safe than when you’re lying underneath your weighted blanket and the burdens of society’s expectations. Once again, this is arguably not furniture at all, as it sits on you. Now you’re the furniture.
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Trust is earned, not given. This chair’s full, God-given name is Giantex Updated Folding Massage Lazy Sofa Floor Chair Sofa Lounger Bed with Armrests and a Pillow Lounger Bed Chaise Couch. It doesn’t deserve your trust, and it seems way too good to be true. It claims to be just about every type of furniture known to man all at once, which is suspicious, but it does have 4 stars out of 5, so it might not just be all talk.
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We’ve saved the least essential for last. If you want to have any shared experience with your roommate, your best bet is with a big ol’ screen. You’ll want to go for a stand that you can actually take with you after you leave college, assuming it isn’t covered in too many stains by then. Actual TV sold separately.
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