When we’re young and inexperienced we’re told story on top of story about what to expect of sex. Maybe even different tricks we can do. Friends. Family. Everyone’s in on it. I’ve heard some stories, and only to find out that most were wrong. All wrong. And in some cases finding out the truth behind them was painful. That’s all a part of life though. Well here goes. 8 lies about sex I believed when I was younger.
I blame the media for this one. All those damned fairytales and picture-perfect relationships. They weren’t exactly true. I guess if you plan your first time out well it can go sweet, but for the most part it was just really awkward, and borderline mistake. Don’t believe the hype. It’s not always rose petals spread on the blanket candlelit aromas and slow jazz music in the background. You have to have excellent communication skills to make that happen, which I don’t think we have as teens. I believed this lie when I was younger, but you couldn’t fool me with it now. If I want something specifically romantic now I plan ahead and look forward to the day. This is one of the big lies about sex I believed.
Liar, liar, liar. Pants NOT bulging with desire. I was with a guy a long time ago, who’s jeans always had that bump in the front of them. You might not know what I’m talking about because a lot of guys wear skinny jeans now and there’s no air in there. Before I hit my 20’s, guys wore baggy jeans and there was always a bulging spot in front because of the way the jeans curled up. Those bumps do not indicate penis size which is what a lot of girls would say back then. This was a lie I believed, but now I have to see it to believe it.
Not true either. Some chubby guys can throw down. I knew this one guy who liked to use handcuffs…He was one of those artsy anime weirdos. I guess they get ideas from all that creepy ass anime porn they watch. Not my cup of tea, but the sex was actually good. Another lie about sex I won’t believe anymore. As the trend goes, #DontJudgeABookByItsCover because big guys have moves too! Definitely don’t believe these lies about sex!
Nuh Uh! It was awkward as hell. This was a lie from way back. Everyone thought it was exhilarating to get hooked up in public then (like they do now). But the first time I tried it, it wasn’t exciting at all. It was uncomfortable and I was totally paranoid the whole time. It couldn’t have ended sooner. Shout out to an ex for hyping up that idea like it would be totally awesome. Liar. I’ll be honest though, that that may have been a lie about sex then, but now, being an older and more mature adult, having a car, things do get turnt up in the end!
This is another lie about sex I believed when I was younger. Maybe you feel that way right now. But if the relationship doesn’t work out with your first, worry not. You’ll get over it. Eventually. Mine is long gone somewhere I don’t know, in a crowd that I never hung with in the first place. So I’ll never see him again. We have no ties. Good riddance.
I’ll admit, I’ve been worried about this one for a long time. Thinking I might’ve really been a lesbian. Turns out I’m actually not…so. Not that anything’s wrong with lesbians. Everyone’s entitled to their choice in sex. What I learned was that if you masturbate enough you’ll learn what you’re preferences are and yeah, I know for sure that I like men. So that lie was uncovered easily.
This is actually just a funny and dumb joke that went around before I actually had sex. One of those crazy teenage sexual expectations rumors. “Sex is so crazy! It’s so wonderful! It’s the best thing in the world! It breaks your back!” Lol.
Let’s just shut this one down right now. The biggest lie in the history of all women. If we sleep with too many people, we’re hoes, we’ve got issues, and all these other horrible critiques. Well those were all crap. I really can’t believe we fell for that for so many years and thank God for evolution and change. Sleep with as many men that you want, ladies. It’s your vagina. You know what that makes you now right? A successful man!
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