Texting a new girl can be tricky. You don’t know her sense of humor yet, how often she’ll respond, or if she refuses to be the one to text first. All of these little things come with time, and once you begin to understand her via text, you might be ready to take things to the next level. If you aren’t sure where to start, keep reading to learn how to text a girl you want to sleep with.
So, you saw her across the bar. Or the dining hall. Or the chemistry lab. And you got her number. Good job! The first step is always one of the hardest, but now you have to put it the work. I don’t know this for a fact, but I am pretty sure very few guys have ever been able to go from “hey” to “you up?” and successfully sleep with a girl.
It is important that you seem interested, but not overeager. Don’t double text her if she doesn’t answer within the first 15 minutes, you will seem needy. Also, don’t text her back 30 seconds after she texts you. If you text her too much, she will be more worried that you’re gearing up to make a suit out of her skin than date her. Keep an even and well-timed flow to your conversation so that you come off as breezy.
Bad grammar or spelling mistakes can be a huge turn off. Don’t use cheesy abbreviations, just spell out the word. Learn the difference between your and you’re, know your there, their, and they’res, and regroup. Sometimes there is nothing sexier than a well put together sentence. Seriously!
If the absolute only goal you have while texting this girl is to eventually sleep with her, that will become extremely obvious to her. Girls can tell when you only want one thing. Sure, you want to sleep with her, but don’t you want to get to know her personality a bit, too? Find out her major, where she is from, and what she does in her spare time. It will not only win you brownie points, but it will make the both of you more comfortable when you hang out in person.
One of the most important parts of learning how to text a girl is to not be too stiff. You’re in a safe space, behind your own phone screen. There is no reason to be nervous! If your texts are really bland or business-like, she might stop answering you. Throw in an emoji here and there – bonus points for a well-timed gif – to let her know you are having fun with the conversation.
Of course, be friendly, that is always important. It is also important to be flirty, though. If you lose your flirtiness along the way, you may have just booked yourself a one-way ticket to the friend zone. Even when you think you are being incredibly obvious that you’re into her, she might think you just want to be friends.
There is a happy medium to flirting. Too little, and she might not pick up on it. Too much, and she might get creeped out. Definitely refrain from excessive use of winky face emojis, because those can get pretty creepy very easily. (Same goes for the winky face emoji with it’s tongue sticking out. There is a time and a place, boys.)
Again, there is a happy medium. It’s fun to get a little sexy here and there, but it is even sexier when you leave more to the imagination. Let her be your guide. If she is starting to get flirtier and even a little naughtier, then take your cues from her. But if you throw a borderline sext into the middle of a seemingly normal conversation, she could easily get freaked out and pull away.
Speaking of knowing where the line is, don’t drunk text her. All of your texts might be fine one minute, and then three hours later you’re texting her 12 times in a row and asking her what she’s doing. It is not a good look for anyone, so just put the phone down once your buzz really starts to kick in.
Or always say good morning! A big part of learning how to text a girl is keeping it consistent, and a goodnight text is always a nice touch when you are just starting to text someone. And it is always nice to know that you put the effort in to end the conversation instead of falling asleep without answering.
We both know I don’t mean pictures of your dog. Do not send pics of yourself to her. Unless she explicitly asks you for them, she does not want them. Trust me on this.
Don’t overthink it, and ultimately you will be fine. You don’t need to meet in a board room with six of your best bros to deliberate what your next message should be. As long as you are yourself, you have nothing to lose.
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