Dealing With Changing Social Circles In College
Prior to starting college, I was repeatedly told that the friends I’d start off with the first week wouldn’t be the same friends I’d have by the end of the semester. People always say your social circles in college change constantly, and they sure were right. Over the course of just a few months, I would switch my group of friends twice before settling on the social circle I currently have. Some of these friendships crashed and burned, while some just stung.
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Know that your first “friends” aren’t always that ones that stick.
Those first social circles in college that I started to become friendly with – I didn’t really expect the friendships to to last. The thing about your first group of friends is that they’re mainly there to get you through the first awkward couple of weeks that is college adaptation. While I understood this from the start, it was scary to think that once our superficial friendships fizzled out, I’d be alone and have to go out and make friends all over again. At this point, many people were lucky enough to have their cliques set in stone, and it isn’t always easy to infiltrate a group of friends.
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Remember that you’ve just met these people…you don’t really know what kind of people they are.
Almost through the first semester together, I developed a small group of friends that I seemed to get along with well. With some disagreements here and there, everything was going fine until it all went up in flames. There had been some previous tension; however, a small fight was the beginning of the end. Betrayal after betrayal, my two former friends had parted ways. This is when I started to realize that while I initially thought I found people I could become close with, I really didn’t know them at all. You don’t truly see who a person is until at least a few months into the relationship – and this is when you might consider a change of social circles in college.
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Accept the difficulty of parting ways from your old group of friends.
It’s not always easy to get over parting ways with old friends, especially in college. When you’re in college, you develop closer friendships than the ones you had in high school, mainly because you are spending just about every waking moment of your day with your social circles in college. After you decide to move on from a group of friends in college, you lose someone to eat lunch with, someone to walk to class with, someone to lounge around and do nothing with, and so much more. But that’s okay – this is only temporary, I promise.
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Remember that there are tons of other people at your school – you WILL find your group.
Sometimes it’s for the best that you part ways with people who are bringing you down so you can meet people who will pull you back up. College is said to be the place where you meet your best friends for life, so don’t fret over the bad apples on the way to the ones who will be there for you through anything. Your former friends aren’t worth fretting over if they didn’t treat you the way friends should be treating you. It may be painful at first, but after a few tries, you’ll find that perfect set of friends!
