10 Things You Will Never Hear A Student Say At University of Waterloo

Walk through campus a few times a day, and you’ll usually hear a the same phrases being thrown about amongst students. Complaints about sleep deprivation, disappointments in grades, and other common student topics of discussions are expected. However, there are a few things you will never hear at the University of Waterloo. Here’s a few we thought of:

1. I’m ready for my exam.

No one is ever ready for their exams at the University of Waterloo. Add up the amount of time you actually spent studying, the number of classes you attended, and the amount of course material you truly retained to determine exactly why that is…and get back to us!

2. This class is really exciting.

I’m not sleeping? Are you sleeping? I love this professor! The way she reads the slides straight off the PowerPoint about grass is so exciting! Wow!

3. No, I’m not hungry.

You just had a breakfast sandwich from Tim Horton’s but your friend’s proposal to grab an early lunch from the University Plaza is an offer you just can’t pass. It’s all good, neither could we!

4. Yeah, I already finished the assignment.

It’s due tomorrow. Don’t ask me if I finished it. Rather, ask me if I started. You know the motto folks, due tomorrow- do tomorrow! No matter how big the assignment.

5. I got a good night’s sleep last night.

Despite hitting that snooze button a total of 6 billion times in one morning, it seems that students at the UW never truly get enough sleep. Maybe it’s because of all the late night ‘studying’ (read: Netflix binging) but we can’t be to sure.

6. I don’t drink coffee.

Wait, so you didn’t get enough sleep last night and you have a six page paper due tomorrow? And now you want to tell me you ‘don’t drink coffee’? I’m going to go ahead and call bull sh*t on that!

7. The geese don’t bother me.

They should have a warning sign about these geese in the application package. I mean, the things don’t even fly south for the winter! What kind of blasphemy…

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8. This is so easy!

I don’t need Google to finish my assignments, write my essays, or clear up the concept that my TA spent 30 minutes trying to teach us. I got this! Said no one. Ever.

9. I know exactly where that is.

PAS 3405? Yeah, that’s up the stairs, down the hall, past the thing with the thing on it, and then to the right of that other thing with that bigger thing on it. You’ll find it, no problem! It’s not like the building is shaped like a brain or anything.

10. I regret coming to Waterloo.

Can’t relate, fam. There’s nowhere I’d rather be.

What are some other things you will never hear at University of Waterloo? Comment below!

Featured image source: veritas.org