The Toys That Will Make You Wonder WTF They Were Thinking
Weird toys are unlike any other toy you can find. These werid toys specifically are not fun, they are not interesting, and in some cases, are highly dangerous. You enjoy Barbie? Well, how about a Barbie with rollerblades that cause sparks? Or what about a curiously designed finger replica of ET? One thing is for sure, every one of these weird toys here will make you wonder WTF they were thinking.
The Gilbert U-238 Atomic Energy Lab
Starting off strong, the first of all the weird toys is the Gilbert U-238 Atomic Energy Lab was a toy meant for inspiring rocket scientists. The toy gave kids almost too much immersion though, as it included a small amount of literal uranium. Only available in 1950 and 1951, fewer than 5000 of these kits were ever sold, and the creator admitted they target the wrong audience with their toy… No shit, sherlock.
Lawn Darts
One of the most well-known toy controversies, lawn darts were a form of darts adapted to play in your yard. Players would toss hand-sized darts and try to score points, but anyone who knows what a dart is can tell you they feature an extra-long, and extra sharp, point. It should come as no surprise that people throwing extra sharp items around caused many injuries and even deaths. Ultimately, Lawn Darts were banned in the United States and Canada.
The Daddy Saddle
The Daddy Saddle was first featured in the 1965 Kenner toy catalog, and since has been recreated by multiple companies. Other than a very suspect name, the daddy saddle was made for kids but was probably used for kinkier adult fun most of the time. In fact, they should rebrand this toy for adults, they wouldn’t even need to change the name!
E.T. Finger Light
This one makes me feel dirty. It was supposed to be a replica of the finger of E.T. Extra-Terrestrial, but the coloring and design make you wonder how nobody involved in this toy design spoke up. Did they know what they were doing, or was everyone who created it just insanely pure?
2007 Easy-Bake Ovens
Easy-Bake ovens are fond memories for many of us, but in 2007, Hasbro recalled the Easy-Bake oven not once, but twice. The specific oven had a small oven opening on the front for the entry of your food, but kids were getting their fingers stuck in the opening. To make matters even worse, some children were getting serious burns, so much so that one child even had to have a finger amputated. In the end, 77 complaints reported burns from the Easy-Bake oven.
Rollerblade Barbie
Rollerblade Barbie was one of the worst ideas for a Barbie that has ever happened. Rollerblade Barbie is exactly what it sounds like, and included a Barbie with rollerblades which a child could push around. However, the bottom of the rollerblades would produce legitimate sparks that would shoot out behind her. Basically, the rollerblades had a sparker from a lighter in them. Everything is fun and games until Barbie rollerblades over a flammable liquid…
The Snack Time Cabbage Patch Doll
The Snack Time Cabbage Doll was a cabbage patch doll that is supposed to eat toy foods such as french fries. The biggest problem was that the mechanical mouth was extremely powerful, so much so that there are multiple reports of fingers and hair being stuck in the mouth. To make matters even worse, the doll did not have an on-off switch, which meant this cannibalistic Cabbage Patch had a hunger for children’s flesh. Mattel finally pulled the plug and offered a $40 refund to anyone who purchased the doll, but the damage had already been done.
Realistic Toy Guns
Toy guns are fun, and not generally considered weird toys. water guns and Nerf guns have continued to be a childhood staple for many. But, one of the worst ideas for toys is realistic toy guns. It does not take a rocket scientist to understand why having a fake but real-looking gun is incredibly stupid, and I personally will never let my kids play with ANY toy guns period.
Magnetix
Magnetix was basically a magnetic tinker toy, but the small pieces posed a real risk of children swallowing the pieces. Any other toy with small pieces could have made this spot, but I chose Magnetix because my cousin swallowed a magnetic ball, and the doctors had to X-ray him and go through his fecal matter to ensure the magnetic balls exit, and after about a week, it totally did make its exit.
CSI Fingerprint Exam Kit
The CSI fingerprinting kit is a pretty good idea in theory. Fans of the show could dust for fingerprints exactly like their favorite characters from the show. The issue, however, was that the play dust, which you use to dust for prints and blow away, contained asbestos. In fact, the playset included enough asbestos to trigger cancer, according to the Environmental Working Group. The powder included 7 percent of tremolite, which is one of the most fatal forms of asbestos ever. Still, it took a lawsuit for these to finally be pulled from toy stores, including Toys R Us.
This Fisher-Price Tricycle
Of all the weird toys, this one wins. The issue with this standard Fisher-Price tricycle was an unfortunately placed ignition and toy key. The ignition and toy key was placed extremely close to the seat, right around the crotch area. After numerous reports of serious injury, including genital bleeding, over seven million units were recalled in the US. That is probably for the best because what kid likes bloody genitals? Not only is this the worst kids’ ride design of all time, but it is officially the weirdest toy on this list!
These weird toys were just as weird as I said, huh? Personally, the Fisher-Price Tricycle is one of the most cringe-inducing toys I have ever seen. The thought of a kid bumping something and getting shot forward makes my stomach hurt, so literally, WTF were they thinking?? Did I forget any of the worst toys of all time? If I did, make sure you let me know in the comments below!
