5 Necessities for a Classy Walk of Shame
Let’s start by being honest, we’ve all been there, or if we haven’t, it’s bound to happen. You wake up in someone else’s bed – possibly a stranger’s or maybe even a good friend you’ve had sexual tension with for a while. You stare at the clock, rub your eyes, and then notice your head is pounding just a bit. You realize that you’re either laying naked in bed or in a pair of the other person’s sweatpants trying to figure out what the hell happened last night and the best way back to your room without being seen.
But, who says you have to bury your head in shame and feel embarrassed to be doing exactly what tons of other college kids are doing too. Instead, hold your head up high, and be happy you enjoyed your night. Follow these few steps to turn your walk of shame into a stride of pride.
1. Brush your hair. Trust me, you’ll thank me in the morning. When you wake up with tangled bed hair or sweaty knots from dancing the night away (and other things) you’ll be happy you have your brush to untangle the mess. Keep a travel size one in your purse at all times. If you don’t have a brush, see if you can spot one in their bathroom, then quickly run it through your tangles to smooth them out enough to look presentable. If there’s no brush, at least use your fingers to comb through your hair enough to detangle it and make it look like you tried.
2. Hair elastic. If your hair just can’t be tamed, brush it out and throw it in a neat bun or pony tail. Even if you have what seems could be a lion’s mane underneath your hair elastic, it will definitely look better pulled up then letting your sex hair run wild through the breeze during your walk back. Whether you keep them on your wrist or in your purse, never start your night without making sure you have a hair elastic with you.
3. Wash your face. If you have time to prepare you stick some cleansing cloths or travel-size facial cleanser in your purse. If you don’t have those, run water over your face and wash away your racoon eyes from your smudged makeup. You don’t need makeup to look beautiful – just rock you! But a little concealer underneath your puffy eyes might be necessary to look like you’re actually awake.
4. Clothes, clothes, clothes. Nothing is more obvious that you did the deed last night as when you’re walking down the street at 8 a.m. in a sparkly dress, with your boobs out and holding your heels. Borrow a pair of sweatpants from your friend, or even better, pack yoga pants and a t-shirt in your bag. Try and dress down the outfit for a daytime appeal and make it look like that’s the outfit you chose to wear that day. Take off your chunky chain necklace and throw on a pair of flip-flops. If you have an awesome roommate or friend (who doesn’t judge you), they can even bring you a pair of clothes to change into and then you will have a pal to do the walk with.
5. Strut your stuff. If you still feel as though you read “one night stand” or “walk of shame” as you open the door in the morning, don’t sweat it. Remind yourself that there is no possible way you’re the only one who spent the night with someone. Hold your head up, smile, and proudly walk back to your place with confidence. Stop caring what other people think, and remember that your life is meant for you to live and enjoy, and the “haters gonna hate”. It’s only shameful if you let it be, otherwise it’s simply your stride of pride.
